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  • Writer's pictureEdward Rogers

...Just Thinking About… Forgiveness

Updated: May 24, 2018

We do not get through life without having negative things happen to us. That’s a fact. The reasons for having these bad things happening to us are as varied as there are people and situations in this world. One thing we can have in common though is that a negative attack on our lives can push us to our limits of what we think we can take before we crack like an egg that is dropped. Usually it is a situation or, more likely, a person who does something we perceive so terrible that all we can see is red, a color of hate and loathing that drives us into dark despair; a dungeon where we can hide in secluded desolation and lick our wounds. That hate takes on a physical form inside our minds, consuming our thoughts until all that we see is no longer positive; all thoughts are now generated through hate.

There is a simple solution to this, though it may not seem so at first. Yes, it is forgiveness. Don’t get me wrong, this doesn’t mean that to forgive means we are supposed to forget our hurts and pain. In fact, it is better to remember the pain so we don’t fall into that situation again. We first need to forgive the person or situation by just letting that happening go. Let it go! Remember it, but turn it into fog in your mind that a fresh wind blows away, never to return. Then, more importantly, you must forgive yourself, for it is by chastising ourselves and blaming ourselves that we hang onto that traumatic situation letting it consume us. We have all done things to others and to ourselves that we regret. That is human. Understand that by being human we do not need to dwell with what went wrong. We can move on for a new chance if we allow it! We can learn from our mistakes and be better people for it! Let the old things go. Don’t take on the burden of what that other person did because that is theirs to deal with and not for us to be concerned with.

When we don’t forgive, we allow that other person or situation to totally control our lives. Then they are the ones who are calling the shots! They are the ones who are making us miserable. Why would we allow someone else to control how we feel?

When you have forgiven yourself and stop blaming yourself for succumbing to just being human, we lift ourselves out of that dungeon of despair and darkness and place ourselves on a new path of light where everything is a fresh vibrant, original experience. That person or experience that was so negative no longer has any control of you. At that point you look toward the light and move on with life.

Let the past go. Live for today.

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